OH, TO LOVE A BEAUTIFUL ILLUSION

She has the soul of a gypsy woman, never to be tamed.

She has the heart of a goddess whose love is never-ending.

She is an amazing mess that somehow magically works.

She is a contradiction in terms that seems to make sense.

She can change the mood as she enters a room; her aura is like that of an angel, magical and free.

She has a childlike innocence, a vulnerability about her, but you know that she is one of the most capable women you will ever meet.

She is as beautiful and elegant as a butterfly, yet there is an underlining unspoken strength so deep within her like you have never felt. You know she will succeed.

A spirit so free it soars like an eagle high above the sky with such skill and flawlessness you envy her.

When you are with her she makes you feel like you are her universe, you are the sun, moon and the stars, there is no other.

Oh, how you admire her; through your arrogance you think you know her. You only see what you want to see. Out of your selfishness, you will not let her go; she brings the light back into your life that was dimmed so many years ago. While you don’t want her, you want no other to have her either.

You see this woman so strong, confident, and stoic, she seems aloof, but she sees everything; she feels things beyond anything you could ever imagine. You admire her strength to pick herself up off the ground, day after day, step by step, with such grace and determination.

Loving her is only falling in love with an illusion she has allowed you to create. You put her on a pedestal so high she is untouchable. She never asked to be put in a place so high and out of reach.

For you, she is strong; every day, every hour, she puts a smile on her face, the pretty dress and shows people what they want to see. She allows you to have your glimmer of hope, lets you think you are in control.

Up so high on her pedestal, she so desperately reaches out and begs to be seen, but the pedestal is too high, and no one hears her cry. No one sees the breaking of her heart as it shatters into a million pieces, slowly dying inside. You only see what you want to see.

She hides her pain; she keeps you at arm’s length. She doesn’t need you to survive, she learnt to survive years ago, she is a champion, a master of illusion. She doesn’t need a knight in shining armour, she learnt a long time ago they don’t exist. If she allows you to enter her hidden sanctum, it is because she wants you there, not because she needs you. Never become complacent.

To be let into her world is an honour you should never betray, there are few people allowed this privilege, she is weary like a lioness protecting her cubs, she will protect herself and those she loves with a fearlessness you have never seen or felt. Once you are in her inner sanctum, she will never let you feel alone, she will always be by your side.

Even after time goes by and you have moved on, she still watches from afar to ensure you are safe, with doors always open. Her love is quiet, without judgement and descends from a place of peace and beauty.

Never fear you are alone in this world, she is right by your side, always and forever.

She gets tired, disillusioned with the world, sometimes she just wants to lay her head down and sleep, wrapped up in kind and gentle arms, knowing that she is safe, and for once she need not sleep with one eye open waiting for the next betrayal.

- Photuni -